Break-ups are hard for everybody and can take a long time to repair from. Whether you dated for a year or five years, someone special in your life is now leaving (amicably or otherwise), and that can be difficult to come to terms with. Helping a friend through a break-up can feel even harder; you’re at an arm’s length from the situation, the whole time watching your loved one hurt. There are thousands of small ways to show support and love for a friend after a difficult break-up, ranging from a surprise flower delivery to letting her cry on your couch.
The most important aspect of supporting someone post-break-up is being there to listen and as a much-needed distraction. A lot of supporting your friend will be intuitive; going over to their house and eating ice cream, going shopping, or spending time outside. Really bad break-ups can be long and drawn out, and it might take your friend a long time to get her over the situation. You can’t be there the whole time, but you can let her know throughout the process that you’re there for her. Here are a few tips on how to deal with a break-up, aside from going to her ex’s house and tossing eggs at it.
Airing of Grievances
After a relationship ends, there can be a lot of things left unsaid. Let your friend get it all out, and provide an open, honest ear for her. Allow her to think about what went wrong in the relationship, but don’t let her paint herself in a negative light or look back with rose-tinted glasses; most breakups are for the best. You can provide a space for a constructive dialogue about why the relationship didn’t succeed, but remind her that no relationship is a failure. Being willing to be emotionally open is always a win!
While you should encourage your friend to cope with her emotions in a healthy way, going out with her friends for a night or two doesn’t hurt, as long as she doesn’t overdo it. If meditating or journaling isn’t her style, encourage her to spend quality time alone doing things she enjoys, or even exploring her own neighborhood.
You can’t be with her 24/7 after a bad break-up, and it’s important that she knows the world is full of things for her to participate in. While you two are together, suggest grabbing dinner, a movie night, or a good old-fashioned sleepover. Sleepovers are a timeless self-care staple! You can make facemasks, paint your nails, drink a bottle of wine (or three), and really unload about things that might be hurting you.
Offer Practical Help
In times of distress, even simple tasks can feel overwhelming. Little tasks that were previously bothersome now become undoable. Ask your friend if there is anything specific you can do, like help move furniture, clean out a closet, or go get groceries. Especially if it involves splitting up a household, there might be a lot of manual labor involved alongside the emotional labor. Let your friend know that you are there to crash and eat ice cream, but also to break a sweat if need be.
Even down the road, your friend might seem to be improving emotionally, but they will still have “good” and “bad” days. Remind them that you’re thinking about their well being with a beautiful, sunny Bouq full of their favorite flowers. Sent to their home or office, with the appropriate note, it’s a surefire way to brighten a loved one’s day!Shop All